3.5 hours: $265 (savings of $55)

Come clean-from inside out. Celebrate the body’s own ability to unload its toxic debris by giving it a bit of assistance with this profoundly cleansing series of treatments. Begin with the cleansing of all cleansings, of the digestive tract: a Classic Colonic. Without a clean colon, the rest of the body becomes systemically auto-intoxicated because of the portal vein that travels from the colon to the liver. The liver is the uber-organ for whole-body-detoxification. A dirty colon leads to a dirty liver, hijacking the liver’s ability to do its job of cleansing the whole rest of the body.

When you’re comfortably cleansed, you relax into having every muscle in your body soothed and smoothed with one of our expert massage therapists. And you end your special treat to yourself with the most relaxing and highly detoxing therapy invented on the planet: floatation. You are lying atop of 800 pounds of Epsom salts. That’s 800 pounds of magnesium (a much needed mineral which you are almost surely deficient in, because most of us are), heated to your precise skin temperature. Thus, there is no nerve transmission from your skin to your brain. We promise, after you get adjusted to the sounds of your own heartbeat and breathing, you will settle into the most blissful state of relaxation you have ever experienced.